T-SQL Tuesday #053 – Why So Serious

Invitation from Matt Velic.

Dirty Little Tricks

The Joker

The Joker

Your mission, should you chose to accept it, is to come up with a piece of T-SQL that could mess with your coworkers. And if you’re committed to the fun, implement it!

Need some ideas? Maybe you could…

  • Write a lengthy script that returns a funny or annoying message
  • Implement hilarious login triggers
  • Use Resource Govenor to limit your victims developers

Honestly the sky is the limit. Just be sure to blog about the results of your trickery if you do pull it off.

Special Warning

Folks, don’t get yourself fired. This is meant to be fun. But you know your work environment better than I do. If your job has a stick up its rear-end, just write your tricks down and keep them up your sleeve for when you’re working at a more relaxed place.

And I shouldn’t have to say it, but don’t do this sh!t in Production.